And so the results of the anthology are here. Well they were actually here about two weeks ago but I've been lazy and haven't posted. But I will first bring you through the journey that ended with one little e-mail.
I, after much deliberation and hair loss sent in my submission. (seriously I spent an hour trying to figure out what to type in the body of the e-mail. Why is that part the most confusing?) And then the waiting....the waiting...more waiting...
I was surprised I had not yet recieved a rejection. And then another e-mail came in saying that I was going to the second round! Specifically that it wasn't an offer, but they really liked the piece. I was thrilled! Published? Me? It seemed closer than ever before! And the timing was great - with so much other personal bad news, me getting published would be amazing.
That excitement lasted for a little while until me and the other second-rounders got bored and decided to plague the anthology thread with nonsense, random e-mail checks, dragon poetry, prospective names for the anthology, and dragon/elf crossovers, as well as some strange movie references I didn't understand. It was a lot of fun. And lasted a long time lol. (Not that I'm complaining - Considering what most turn-arounds are, Mac was extremely fast, and kind, posting little updates when she could. It was just my first submission so I was hopped up on impatience :D) Finally Mac told us that any e-mail she sends out would be a rejection. So people started to avoid checking their e-mails. And somehow, I scraped by again. After three more weeks, she said we would know the final Table of Contents by the end of the week.
Somehow I forgot about that deadline and ended up rushing to my computer on Saturday Night. And there, in my inbox was a nice, polite, heart-breaking rejection.
My first rejection - I guess I'm a real writer now huh? And as nice as it was...I couldn't help it. I felt crushed. I felt worthless and stupid and horrible. I felt like a failure, and I felt that way for a few days after too. But I picked myself up. The reason it was rejected was because it didn't fit the theme of the anthology - not because it was an awful story right? And since the theme wasn't agreed upon before submission, how could I have possibly known mine wasn't going to fit? So it's not my fault - it's not anyone's fault. It just happens. And as a writer I need to get used to the fact that a rejection doesn't always mean something negative. Sometimes they just happen.
-Jessie
