Wow guys hard to believe it's been a month since my last post...and a month since I've accomplished anything. In the story that is. But in my life too. I've just felt like at a standstill for some reason, with no real accomplishments.
I say I don't have enough time to work on the story, which is true, but I could make time. Believe me, there's only a couple shows I like on TV anyway. Yet I spend hours just sitting there. What happened to me having a real goal? For some reason I stopped trying. I don't know if it's because the characters are less interesting...thing is, I have to stop blaming the characters. I know that they're just as good and as interesting as Eric was in BE. The reason I stopped working is because I was taking it too seriously. Every time I write it's just another instance of "I'm not good enough".
I've been writing 3rd person books for years but one 1st person book and now I'm frozen, afraid to death of Telling too much, How to actually "show" things and just being an amateur altogether. Well maybe I am an amateur. I need to stop holding myself up to the standards I have. Standards are good, but for me they're stopping me from moving forward. I think the real problem is I'm afraid of wasting my time. Which is ironic as writing counts as practice whereas watching TV is a real waste of time. I need to go back and reconnect with the characters, start writing again. But every time I think that I get this little feeling of dread and a mile-long to-do list forms in my head. But the reason that list doesn't shorten is because I never do anything to solve it! I have to stop stopping and get over this...whatever it is. It's time to finally end my writing break. It's been too long anyway.
I need to find a notebook...
-Jessie
