My First Submission

Well I subbed it. Eep! It took me a while to come up with the best thing to write. I seriously was freaking out trying to make it as perfect as possible. And while perfection can't be obtained, I was pretty happy with the product. Now I'm just working on not thinking about it.

Do you guys ever get that way? I mean I was talking to my friend about it and she said that she was sure "they" would love it. My first thought was, "Don't tell me that!". I really don't want to think about it and I sure as hell don't want to get my hopes up. If it does get rejected than the letter itself will be hard enough to get through, without the soul-crushing despair that goes with deluding yourself into something that just didn't happen. I don't want ot tell people. I don't want to boast to them that I just submitted something (it's not exactly something to boast about either) I'd rather just keep it to myself. As it is I only told two friends and my parents. I don't want to think about the possibilities of it being accepted, because that scares me more than being rejected.

I'm not even sure if that makes any sense at all. But I just don't want to contemplate it or I'll obsess over it forever and won't get anything else done (Because I'm so productive normally). So if you will indulge me with a happy cookie dance, I will be on my way.

Thank you. That is all.

-Jessie

P.S. I probably won't post again until I get the letter back on whether I'm accepted or rejected, because I have a few ideas I need to roll around my head (to clear out all the clutter). But you never know, stranger things have happened.